The Monday Meme... No 4. TV Cameraman Trumps Presenter.

The next time you sit down to watch a tv show about climbing the North face of the Eiger, hiking the length of the Serengeti looking for dangerous kittens, descending into North Pole ice caves or generally showing just how tough the presenter is, remember just one thing as you push that burger into your face...

Presenters... Rough, Tough, but always come second place in the race to the top of the mountain.

That's right... Just who do you think is standing in front of the sweaty, out of breath presenter as they claim victory over the elements of nature..? Who is it that they turn to as they breathlessly pontificate about their adventurous spirit and acts of derring do..?

The TV Cameraman... That's who. As the presenter huffs and puffs the last few steps to reveal the view, wiping the dirt from their brow whilst carefully avoiding damaging their logo'd sportswear, the faithful recorder of these momentous occasions will possibly roll their eyes.

You see, the cameraman has probably been there for a good while, carefully sequencing the shots as the overpaid hairdo with matching teeth gradually advances up the slope. The presenter may say something to the watching lens like...

"That was a tough climb, dangerous yet exhilarating... But take a look at the view.."

Whilst the cameraman is thinking to themselves...

"Yeah, I did it three hours ago carrying a tv camera, tripod, batteries, a huge roll of gaffers tape and a bag of cheesy puffs. Plus a grumpy sound man who complains about the wind noise..."

So next time you see your favourite hero selflessly endangering themselves for your viewing pleasure, think about the poor sap who had to film it... You didn't see the presenter lugging the tripod up the slope did you..? No... You didn't. He had a day sack, containing sandwiches and a flask of coffee, a mobile phone and a big fat tv contract.

Oh, and another thing. As the presenter stands atop the conquered mountain in their expensive logo'd storm jacket, climbing trousers and boots, with a steely eyed glare and just a hint of 'roughing it' stubble, (Which includes the lady presenters) the TV cameraman is probably stood there in a pair of cargo shorts, flip flops and an AC/DC World Tour T-Shirt, circa 1976.

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.

www.media-attention.co.uk

Order..! Order..! A TV News Cameraman In Parliament.

Not only have i stepped in plenty of dog poo over the years, I have stepped into many, many rooms as a TV News Cameraman. Yesterday though, for the first time in my long and illustrious news gathering career, (Stop laughing...) i stepped into the mother of all rooms.

The Chamber of the House of Commons, in the Palace of Westminster, appears on the TV news on countless occasions every week that Parliament sits, yet i had never entered it.

The Palace of Westminster...

I was not in a privileged position, the chamber is open to the public for daily tours during down time, and the cut and thrust of British politics can be witnessed from the public gallery when MP's are shouting Boo-Yah at each other, and generally cocking things up.

But yesterday, whilst waiting for an interview with a local MP, i was given a peek. Apart from the very kind security lady who took me in, i was alone in the chamber... and apart from being surprised at just how small the chamber is, i was taken in by the deep polished wood, green leather benches and history of that room.

In my minds eye i could see Churchill standing at the very dispatch box that i now touched. The Duke of Wellington, Sir Robert Peel, and the protectorate under Oliver Cromwell. This small chamber, although much changed throughout time, just oozes history from the 14th Century onwards. I let it sink in.

In around 24 hours or so, the current Prime Minister will take his seat where i now sat, (I tried to squeeze out a fart... nothing) having recalled Parliament on the death of Baroness Margaret Thatcher, a figure who in her time here, caused passions on each side of the chamber, and on the streets, to reach boiling point. I too, wanted to leave my statesmanship like mark...

My inner Dennis the Menace mind began to wander... A whoppee cushion under the Prime Ministers seat..? 50p under the Chancellors seat, with a note telling him to spend it wisely..? I could possibly even leave an A4 sheet of hastily written policies under the seat of the Leader of Her Majesties Opposition... Super glue on the Speakers chair... Oh the possibilities.

A small 'Ahem' from my minder brought me back to reality. I asked if i could take a picture of me in the chamber, but i was warned that if i did, an encounter with Black Rods implements of death would be my fate... followed by an unceremonious ejection at high velocity from Parliament by a big hairy policeman, or a big hairy policewoman. (She exists, just outside St Stephens Gate).

Pah. You pay for all this in taxes and not even a photo to prove i was there, my little part in its history. A wave of revolutionary 17th Century fervour kicked in. I took one last look... And a well known phrase came to mind...

"Guy Fawkes... The only man in history to enter Parliament with honest intentions."  

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.

www.media-attention.co.uk

The Monday Meme... No 3. Mind where you're sticking that thing.

TV Cameramen see the strangest of things and sometimes put themselves in danger to get the shot...

Don't worry Mr Yamamoto... This won't hurt a bit. On first glance at this picture that's what i thought anyway.

Now don't get me wrong, a job is a job, but sometimes you have to seriously question what it is you do for a living, and just why... why am i pointing my camera between a very large Japanese gentleman's buttocks.

Thanks to Overheard in the live truck for finding and sharing this little gem.

The things you see as a cameraman...

Let's just hope that this poor cameraman isn't on the receiving end of a heavy nights drinking and sushi session. The results could be catastrophic and something he would have on his mind for a long long time to come.

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.

www.media-attention.co.uk

Are TV News Cameramen Quicker Than Producers..?

Here's a little quandary for all you TV News producers out there. Can a mere news cameraman, armed with an iPad Mini and a mobile phone, produce more up to date information on a breaking top national news story than you can, sat in a multiple million pound news centre in London..?

Modern weapons of a TV News Cameraman...

Well today as it turns out, yes I can.

Today I was tasked with doorstepping a high profile banking figure at his house where, i was reliably informed, he lived. I was given the address of the house, which turned out to be a business address, not a residential one. The house next to it however, seemed a likely target given that the name of the address supplied was only one word out, and it looked the kind of place where a banker would hide his millions. I informed the newsroom.

We'll get right back to you, they said. (Don't laugh..) So I waited.

In the meantime I Googled the name of my errant quarry. What he looked like, his business dealings and interests. I grew suspicious that our man didn't live here. Again, i informed my producer... I was told to doorstep the house. I puffed out my chest, flexed my muscles and got ready for possible verbal abuse or a jab in the bottom by a pitchfork wielding banker. I doorstepped the house. They had never heard of him. He didn't live there. My Spidey senses were tingling...

I Googled him again. Given his current high profile news status, getting past the story was tough... Business listings, directorships... BINGO..! I've seen that company somewhere.

Currently a director of ***Ltd. Quick look at business address next door... DOUBLE BINGO..!

Double check... Google name, business and address... FULL HOUSE..! He's the Director of the business next door. I'll take my winnings in cash please.

I inform my producer, who was waiting on more info... From the business correspondent, who in all fairness to them both, we're probably up their eyes in what is a big story here in the UK.

But it was nice to know that my detective skills are still razor sharp, and on the bleeding edge of mobile technology. On this occasion, I turned out to be quicker than a multi million pound newsroom. Can i have a bankers bonus..?

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.

www.media-attention.co.uk

TV News Cameraman Takes BBC Great British Class Survey.

I hope my readers from foreign climes will forgive me. You see us here in Great Britain are obsessed with class. In the news here today a new British class survey is hot news. Gone are working, middle and upper classes to be replaced by 7 classes of people. These are they...

• Elite: This is the most privileged class in Great Britain who have high levels of all three capitals. Their high amount of economic capital sets them apart from everyone else.
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• Established Middle Class: Members of this class have high levels of all three capitals although not as high as the Elite. They are a gregarious and culturally engaged class.
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• Technical Middle Class: This is a new, small class with high economic capital but seem less culturally engaged. They have relatively few social contacts and so are less socially engaged.
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• New Affluent Workers: This class has medium levels of economic capital and higher levels of cultural and social capital. They are a young and active group.
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• Emergent Service Workers: This new class has low economic capital but has high levels of 'emerging' cultural capital and high social capital. This group are young and often found in urban areas.
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• Traditional Working Class: This class scores low on all forms of the three capitals although they are not the poorest group. The average age of this class is older than the others.
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• Precariat: This is the most deprived class of all with low levels of economic, cultural and social capital. The everyday lives of members of this class are precarious.

Source: bbc.co.uk/science

You would think that as a TV News Cameraman, i would come out of the BBC Great British Class Survey somewhere in the middle. Seeing as i'm self employed and therefore handcuffed to the ebb and flow of broadcasters cash flow, my income can be described as erratic to say the least.

"Excuse me officer... do keep those plebs at bay... there's a good chap."

Sometimes i earn shed loads, sometimes i earn fuck all. Peaks and troughs is a well known term in the Freelance TV industry. I'm guessing that most tv cameramen, freelance at least, would be around the same mark. On my survey at least, I guessed wrong... Oh so very wrong. I guessed wrong because of only one thing... Money. I shall reveal my class later...

Anybody who knows me and works alongside me knows that i'm a down to earth, robust and foul mouthed individual who generally speaks his mind. I get on with most people, and was brought up to respect others, work hard and educate myself. I would put myself into the realm of the old working to middle class.

The survey though, asks some very generalised questions. Apparently, going to the theatre makes me out to be a champagne guzzling chinless wonder, but it didn't ask me what i went to see... It was Spamalot.

Do i own my own home? Yes, yes i do. But it is an ex council property, nothing with any acreage, faux Georgian columns at the front door or swimming pool cunningly hidden in the shrubbery.

The thing that changed my survey entirely was the question of money. You see i'm lucky enough to have some in reserve. Trust fund..? No. Inheritance from a long lost millionaire uncle..? Again, no. I have some because i worked bloody long hard hours for it. I built a small but reasonably successful one man business. It took me about ten years of hard graft to get to this point where i can feel relatively safe on the cash front.

Because of this one fact, i have been classed in the survey as...

ELITE.

Yep, you read that right. I am apparently a part of the top 6 percent in the country. Look, i go to museums occasionally to see things that interest me. I go to the theatre occasionally to see things like Spamalot. I try to educate myself through reading. 

But i work for a living, and when i do work i get paid reasonably well, and when i have some left over i save it for my retirement. Considering what some people earn who do lots more real work that i will ever do, i feel quite lucky. Elite though i am definitely not. I will not let this result influence me in any way whatsoever...

Anyway, for future reference, i will be addressed as Lord ukcameraman, and you may doff your cap or touch your forelock in my exulted presence. Tea shall be served in the form of Darjeeling in a china cup and i shall be taking to wearing a monocle at all times.

You will know it is me on the street corners at the next crime scene as my manservant shall be holding an umbrella to shield me from the rain. Has the class system in the UK broken down or become more blurred..?

Well of course it has, otherwise i would not be talking to the likes of you, would i..?

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.

www.media-attention.co.uk