Monday, 6 May 2013

The Monday Meme... No 7. Live Broadcasting Spagetti Bingo.

Now any TV News Cameraman will tell you that hooking up to a satellite truck to crank out a live talking hairdo back to the studio is a piece of cake. A couple of cables at worst, but mostly now, via a Digilink from the camera back to the truck... No cables needed.

Spaghettio Bingo...

The only thing that worries me about Digilinking is the fact that i just don't know how many microwaves are being pumped through my right earhole, via my slowly cooking brain, and back to the truck.

I sometimes have nightmares that the link will somehow bypass the camera output and pick up my brainwaves, sending those out on the evening news instead... You really don't want to know what's going on in my head whilst the hairdo babbles on in front of camera. It could be good, bad or sexy thoughts... It would be a completely random series of cuddles, punches or cleavage, largely dependent on who's in front of my lens at the time of transmission. 

Anyhow, i like cables. Good old fashioned cables that snag on long cable runs, trip up the unsuspecting passer by and deposit all kinds of nasty onto your hands if you don't wear gloves on the de-rig. They are dependable sentinels of the passing of pictures, frequency free in fair weather or foul.

Just don't ask me to rig a large outside broadcast truck with multi-camera feeds, power cables and satellite links... I did that once, and brought the whole of Channel 4 racing to a standstill, until a rigger in the guise of an AC/DC roadie, complete with hair, tattoos and fierce grimace, told me i was a plonker and should stick to the news.

I shall be taking his sage advice.

Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.